(Talk Given in Stake Conference)

As I was returning a call from President Francis 2 weeks ago, I realized my timing was poor, it was during a Jazz game. I could hear the game, but couldn't hear him very well, and the connection kept coming and going. He finally went outside so I could understand that he wanted me to speak in conference and to give me the subject for my talk. Then I had to repeat it back to him, so he knew I had understood.

Interestingly, I had received a similar message just a week prior to this phone call. My husband and I were in the bishops office, and Bishop Rawlins told me that he was releasing me from my calling as Young Women's president. I felt the expected sorrow because I love serving with the Young Women. But I immediately felt something much stronger-that still small voice of the spirit, telling me without words specifically what I should do now to fill some of that extra time I would have. And that was to focus on Teaching the gospel in our home to strengthen individual testimonies. And that is my subject for this talk.

Isn't it interesting that with all the technology today, with cell phones we can talk to each other anywhere, we still can't come close to how clear and undeniable the message can be when the spirit speaks to us. In only a moment, that day in the bishop's office the message was clear, and I didn't have to ask to have it repeated. I knew without a doubt.

Some of the most critical things I have learned on this subject, have come from those least favorite, heart wrenching situations with children. Our 2nd child and oldest son who always pushed the limits, decided in high school he didn't need rules, church, or seminary, didn't have a testimony and simply wanted us to "let him live his own life." Now in retrospect, as he is serving a mission in Italy, there are three things I learned through him and my other 5 children, about helping children gain their own testimony:

1. Never stop Praying and Listening, Listening to the Spirit, and to our Children

I am so thankful for a few times, in dealing with our son, when I prayed and the spirit spoke, not in a whisper but loud and unmistakable and I listened. One such time was one evening, my husband was out of town, and I knew I needed to find my son and bring him home. He had not been talking to us much at all, but that night as we sat in the car together, into the early hours of the morning, he opened up and I mostly listened. I didn't enjoy some of the things I was hearing, but I believe it was a critical time for both of us, I had prayed, I listened to the spirit, he was ready to talk and I listened to my son.

I am also thankful for the times when I didn't get a specific answer to prayer. Brigham Young Said, "If I do not know the will of my father, in regard to my own course, or that of my family, my children, or those that I preside over, and get no answer from Him, and then do the very best that my judgment will teach me, He is bound to own and honor that transaction.." Sometimes, given time and a different perspective, I believe we can look back and see that though we felt alone at the time, the Lord really was directing us in more subtle ways. I also believe that because we continued to pray for our son, others, many who are in this room today, were prompted to help him also.

2. Never Stop Teaching and Testifying

Elder Robert D. Hales said, "As parents, we are sometimes too intimidated to teach or testify to our children." He goes on, "I have been guilty of that in my own life. Our children need to have us share spiritual feelings with them and to teach and bear testimony to them.

Remember in Alma 36 when Alma the Younger was racked with torment by the memory of his many sins, "he remembered hearing his father teach about the coming of "Jesus Christ, a Son of God, to atone for the sins of the world. "His father's words led to his conversion. Will our teaching and testimony be remembered by our children?

My husband and son used to argue-and from my perspective, arguing made no sense and did more harm than good. But somewhere in those arguments, my husband would often bear his testimony to our son. What a strange time, I thought, to share such a sacred thing as a personal testimony, when he wasn't listening anyway! Well, Dallin has written home and thanked his dad for continuing to preach to him and for sharing his testimony even when he wasn't listening. So was he really not listening?

3. Don't Ever Give Up

Elder Hales said, "We must understand that each of our children comes with varying gifts and talents. Some, like Abel, seem to be given gifts of faith at birth. Others struggle with every decision they make. As parents, we should never let the searching and struggling of our children make us waver or lose our faith in the Lord."

It is so easy to get discouraged when we try so hard to help strengthen our children's testimonies and they don't respond. I remember failed family home evenings, when because of the dynamics of some family members, it seemed the results were only negative. Elder Hales said, "During a family council in my own home, my wife said, `When you may think that someone has a perfect family, you just do not know them well enough. " So I've learned that in spite of not so ideal situations, I can't give up. I look around me, in my ward family and see many examples where it is working. I will share three that are inspiring to me: Sister Rawlin has 2 grandsons who have somewhat recently joined their family. Part time, they are in much less than ideal situations, but they as grandparents are helping to teach them the gospel and sharing their testimonies. She said, "It has been easy for us. And when these boys have been away, they come back and they are full of questions and are hungry for more. Brother Kennan, a single grandfather, is helping to raise his 7 year old granddaughter. His obvious purpose now is to teach her to gain her own testimony. Just yesterday I heard this story: "This 7 year old was playing at a neighbor's home, playing with dolls. This doll wasn't Barbie, this doll was Sariah, and she was telling in detail the story of Sariah from the Old Testament. Sister Gaskin, a young single mother of three boys, working and going to school and raising these boys alone, but what is most obvious to those who know her is that she is teaching her sons what is most important-to have their own testimonies of the gospel of Jesus Christ. We don't need to have the ideal situations to be successful at this.

Elder Henry B Eyring said, "We can teach even a child to understand the doctrine of Jesus Christ, simply The best time to teach is early, while children are still immune to the temptations of their mortal enemy, and long before the words of truth may be harder for them to hear in the noise of their personal struggles. A wise parent would never miss a chance to gather children together to learn of the doctrine of Jesus Christ. Such moments are so rare in comparison with the efforts of the enemy. For every hour the power of doctrine is introduced into a child's life, there may be hundreds of hours of messages and images denying or ignoring the saving truths.

The question should not be whether we are too tired to prepare to teach doctrine or whether the child isn't beginning to think that we preach too much. The question must be, "With so little time and so few opportunities, what words of doctrine from me will fortify them against the attacks on their faith which are sure to come?" The words you speak today may be the ones they remember. And today will soon be gone."

I am thankful for the example of my parents, who still do not miss an opportunity to teach and share their testimonies with their 9 children and many grandchildren.

I am thankful that I know that this gospel is the only way, and that in spite of our shortcomings, if we're doing all we can in our homes to teach our children, that we won't be alone. I'm thankful that I can hear and understand the voice of the spirit in my life and that through Christ's atonement, He will fill in those gaps and help us help our families gain testimonies that can withstand anything..

(January 2001)

By Sally O Meservy